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Monicah Muhoya

Your FEMININITY Is Your Super Power!

Updated: May 24, 2022


LET’S TALK FEMININITY AND EMOTIONS. Femininity/Womanliness is in our DNA as women. According to Wikipedia Femininity is defined as a set of attributes, behaviors, and roles generally associated with women and girls. Femininity can be understood as socially constructed, and there is also some evidence that some behaviors considered feminine are influenced by both cultural factors and biological factors.

Its how you carry yourself, talk , mannerism, energy, aura and most importantly the true embracing of who you are as a girl or woman with values. Social media has come and changed the way femininity is viewed.

Here are some tips on how to tap into your femininity:

HOW TO EXUDE FEMININITY To exude the energy of femininity, it has to occur naturally and easily just as much as the masculine energy happens to also be part of us. (Feminine energy is “BE” and masculine energy is “DO) It is a gift to know how to balance and be aware where you implement both in your life and it comes from a place of inner peace. Society, has conditioned women to be humble often seen as making ourselves (small), when you tap and exude femininity naturally you ooze confidence and operate from your authentic self.


INNER PEACE & GRATITUDE Inner peace is key, and it helps how you are seen from without as you are happier within if you experience inner peace and happiness. Choose every day to honour yourself so that people around you can learn and know how to honour you as you deserve. In a society that continues to put women in a box, It is only fair when we tap into the realness and the core of who we are as this will not cause us shrinking to fit into the societal box. Feminine energy helps you navigate and lead a quality life on your terms.

Practice gratitude remember “Be grateful for whatever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond” Rumi.

SELF IDENTITY Be aware of your sexuality and keep it sacred, know who you are and embrace your self-identity. Once you are aware of who you are, there is no day people will throw questions like “Who do you think you are?”. Protect yourself at all costs, be intentional, decide where “environment” design your surroundings to make good choices. Be stern with who has access to your femininity, it’s your superpower and you have control over who experiences it. Carry yourself with poise, elegance, confidence and class in the best way

you know. When you check in to your “feminine mode”, you will cease to shift shape, people pleasing, perfecting as you will exist unapologetically. “Who I am is a non -negotiable”.

SELF-INDULGENCE Indulge your senses as a woman, taking care of yourself is a form of self-love. Define the best way you indulge or define what self-care looks like to you. Some of us love indulging with a good meal, wine, spa, dancing, nice clothes and being in certain environments like hiking and picnics. Self-care is real love, you define your routine, make a plan and execute depending on your community and lifestyle. Give yourself first what you expect from others, you cannot pour from an empty cup. Being feminine is self-sufficiency!

LET’S TALK EMOTIONS Emotions are beautiful, natural responses by our body reacting to environments and situations. They act as protector (Fight or fright or freeze) mode, and they help us to experience life and the world fully. Be aware and identify how you are of feeling. It is in the present we fully immerse in the experience of life, don’t be caught up with the culture of “this is the way I have always been” recreate yourself constantly. Then define what they are telling you by experiencing and let go off the emotions. Most of the successful people know how to experience and let go off emotions. Learn to “Unmemorize the emotions” by practicing stillness and being present sis!

EVALUATE YOUR EMOTIONAL HEALTH. Remember they are temporary. There are time zones and they come from internal and external sources. (e.g Spouses, life hurdles, Internal can range from PMS, periods,) For women, we tend to have a lot hormonal triggers and it is important for all of us to be aware and track our different phases when hormones take the better of us, could be about periods, menopause, pregnancy and many other factors. Know your body by listening, honouring and slowing down, we only have one body to live in. Your body is your forever YOLO Partner, take care of it intentionally.

Emotions can destroy so much and calls for one to devise an emotional plan to handle them. When you are brought up in a family or community that experienced trauma it is much heavier and a plan to heal and move on is important. Therapy and other healing modalities are important, your social capital is key in leveling your mental wellbeing.

BUILDING EMOTIONAL MATURITY Know your trigger: You can be walking around blaming people for pushing your buttons. What are your emotional triggers, some people uses them to manipulate you. They know when to press and control you. Sis, take your power back and identify them, devise a logical sense around them and start to thrive.

Emotional and holistic growth starts from looking within and making a decision to work on an emotional balance. It has to start from knowing yourself, go within and deeper with intentionality. It is about time to put them in a glass case, knowing your triggers is realizing your patterns you can do this by journaling and keep a stock of what pisses you off e.g If you don’t like to be yelled at just communicate or extract yourself. Triggers are different for all us, it could be a person, an environment or situation that stifles you constantly be aware and hold it together.

EMOTIONAL DONTS DO NOT make a decision when you are upset!

Don’t let the “WHEN” make you decide life altering decisions e.g breaking up with your significant other, saying words that cant be unsaid but at the same time allow yourself to feel the emotions. Pushing them down creates room for bitterness, outburst and anger, you don’t want to be called “the Angry one” “The bitter one”.

Know where to leave your emotions, do not bring your home issues or emotions to work. Don’t bring people into your emotions because in that emotional state you cannot think logically or try to bring people down to your level to feel validated.

Create boundaries, they are your way of communicating “RESPECT ME”. Remember your boundaries are a reflection of your inner strength; conflict is a reflection of your inner weakness.

“Knowing your own darkness is the best method for dealing with the darkness of other people” Carl Jung.

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